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  • Writer's pictureCharles Cherney

132: The Gap and The Gain

I just finished reading The Gap and the Gain (2021) by Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan.


This is an excellent book that posits that right now in this moment, one's mindset puts one either in the GAP or the GAIN.


The GAP is negative. External. It includes complaining. Victimhood. Circumstance. Fate. Reaction. Focusing on other things and other people as the source of the meaning of one's life.


The GAIN is positive. Internal. It includes supportive self-talk. Gratitude. Acceptance. Fortune. Action. Focusing on one's own response and actions as the source of the meaning of one's life.


As Benjamin Hardy notes, "Being in the GAIN is not simply about seeing life on the bright side. Being in the GAIN is about taking every experience life throws at you and transforming it to serve you."


NO MATTER WHAT experience you are currently having, you can appreciate that moment AS A GAIN.


As Hardy notes, "Rather than getting emotionally reactive and caught up in small moments, you appreciate your GAINS and learn from your experiences."

For myself, I reflect on living through the pandemic:

It has afforded me the opportunity to spend more time with myself and my family. GAIN.

It has me walking more. And riding a new exercise bike on a regular basis. GAIN.

It has me reading more. GAIN.

It has me enjoying playing video games for the first time in over 40 years. GAIN:)


In the GAIN, everything in life happens FOR you, not TO you.


In the GAIN, YOU are not an object; rather, YOU are a subject.


That last bit from the quote above bears repeating - any experience can be transformed into a GAIN.


A simple example from my own life:

Our washing machine broke down the first week in January. It will finally be replaced with a new one this first week of March. My mom who lives nearby has been helping us out while we are without a machine. GAIN. I have a new appreciation for the convenience of having laundry machines at home. GAIN.

Working with the appliance company to get a new machine taught me greater patience. GAIN.

I am that much more grateful for clean clothes. GAIN.


This very moment you can be either in the GAP or the GAIN. You decide. Get in the GAIN.

Light. Energizing. Freeing. Confidence building. BE in the GAIN.

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